note to self...

Never, ever again eat lasagna while watching a movie about flesh eating zombies.

Just an all around bad idea if I do say so myself.

musical memories

Songs hold so many memories for me. I can usually remember when a past event happened by thinking about the music I was listening to at the time. There are certain songs that are like little four-minute musical memories. They come on the radio and take me back to different points in my life.

Crossroads by Bone Thugs-n-harmony – reminds me of my first serious crush, my first sorta-kiss.

Freak on a Leash by KoRn – reminds me of spring break my junior year of high school, when I first fell in love with a band, when I knew I wasn’t alone.

Lean on me by damn near everyone – reminds me of riding around in the back of a truck with Jade, a very close friend, my sophomore year. It was like two in the morning and we had gone swimming in the river. After the cops asked us to leave we jumped in the back of a friends truck and rode home soaking wet and singing lean on me at the top of our lungs. Completely sober mind you.

Kokomo by The Beach Boys – reminds me of my mom. Every time we went anywhere together we would listen to this song.

Keep Away by Godsmack – reminds me of my first Christmas with The Bear. (Don’t ask)

Last Resort by Papa Roach – this song came out around the same time The Bear and I moved from San Angelo to San Antonio.

The Distance by Cake – reminds me of Tara, my friend (the best friend a girl could ever ask for) the first time I smoked pot we were in her attic-bedroom listening to this song.

Ice Ice Baby by Vanilla Ice – 5th grade, there was a guy in my class who always brought his boom box to school and would dance to that song every day during lunch break.

Cover Girl by New Kids on the Block – Cassie, the girl who lived across the street and I used to play dress up and pretend we were married to certain members of New Kids on the Block. We also used to play hide and seek in the funeral parlor that made up the first story of her house. Ever tried to hide in a casket?


I’m sure I have more of them but I am drawing a blank at the moment. Anyway, it’s your turn. Can you think of a song that brings back memories for you?

it was bound to happen eventually

*ring ring*

(ok, it doesn’t actually ring so much as play Chop Suey by System of a Down when my mom calls me.)

me- Hello

mom- You have a very sick mind young lady.

Me- Well, yeah, but what the fuck are you talking about?

Mom- And that’s another thing, you say ‘fuck’ entirely to much.

Me- Huh?
(thinking-is it actually possible to say fuck to much?)

mom- And just what is this about a woman fucking a horse?

(imagine a light bulb coming on above my head and then shattering into a million pieces.)

me- Fuck. FUCK! You found my blog!?! Shit.

Mom- I’m calling [insert names of my very religious dad and step-mom here] to tell them about this.

Me- Don’t even think about it. That is so not cool. How the fuck did you find out about my blog anyway?

Mom- Your sister. You sound upset. Why? Am I not allowed to read your blog?

Me- No mom, your not. It’s the first rule of blogging, your mom is not allowed to read it. LaciLu is so going to die for this.

Mom- Well don’t worry, you know I hardly ever get online anyway. So your brother knows about this?

Me- Uh…yeah. He’s been reading it for months.

Mom- So he knows how insane you are?

Me- Yup, along with everyone else who happens across my blog.

Mom- *sigh* You get this from me.

Me- Yup *smile* (crisis averted)



My mom is the shit.

I’m the kind of girl who…

…would have ignored this tag if Kate would have let me.
…can cook but pretends she can’t.
…thinks fall is the best season.
…loves cold weather.
…can’t clean house without loud music playing.
…thinks of sarcasm as a way of life.
…loves watching horror movies, especially campy ones.
…HATES the color purple with an unexplainable passion.
…thinks sunset is far better than sunrise.
…loves nighttime/the dark.
…loves to read
…especially loves to read cheesy romance novels
…procrastinates about everything
…loves her husband, Tourette's and all*
…can shoot a gun.
…normally has incredibly good luck.
…believes in ghosts.
…thinks Cinderella is the best movie ever made.
…takes hot baths almost every night.
…hates spiders, especially daddy-long-legs.
…understands her brother/best friend on all levels.
…thinks pumpkin custard ice cream from Baskin Robbins is the ‘best ever’.
…hates that said ice cream is only available in October.
…loves the fact that it’s October right now.
…can’t type while looking at the keyboard.
…loves her breasts and the fact that they are DD.
…wishes people would stop calling her on her cell phone all the time.
…hates when she goes over her minutes.
…thinks that this list has become entirely to long.

*my husband doesn’t actually have Tourette's, it just seems like it at times.

Never would have imagined this…

Take the quiz: "Which desperate housewife are you?"

Bre
You make everything perfect but sometimes it backfires

and the husband of the year award goes to...

My husband, great man that he is, sometimes over indulges me. Every now and then he does something that makes me realize all over again just how fucking lucky I am to have him in my life. Last night for example...

The Bear is taking this week off of work to get in some R&R. So, to his parents that means he is available to do repairs to their house for a week. Yesterday, we installed a new (and much larger, mind you) front door in their house. All day project, that. Afterwards, we came home, showered, ate dinner (which he made, by himself, while I talked on the phone with Kate.) and then went our separate ways. He headed towards the computer and I went to the bedroom to watch the Gilmore Girls episode I had recorded earlier that evening. At 10:00pm I am halfway through Gilmore Girls when I notice a commercial for first-time-on-DVD-limited-time-only-digitally-remastered-platinum-edition Cinderella. Available in stores...wait for it...TODAY!! omg, how could I have forgotten about something as important as Cinde-fucking-rella coming out on DVD.

(warning...what follows is not made up or a figment of my imagination; this shit actually happened.)

I jumped out of bed, ran into the living room, did the happy dance and said"Get dressed, we have to go to Wal-Mart." The Bear looks at the clock and asks why we have to go to the store at 10pm. I jokingly tell him about the Cinderella situation and how it is my favorite movie (like he didn't already know!) and I have to have it. I was honestly expecting him to laugh, shake his head and tell me to pick up a copy after work tomorrow, when he says to me "ok, put your clothes on and we'll go." When I finally realized he wasn't joking, that he really was going to take me to Wal-Mart, (which btw, is 30min. away) at 10pm on a weeknight, to buy a cartoon, I also realized how lucky I am to have a man like him love me as much as he does.

And then, Kate calls me today from her office and tells me that she is about to start crying from the comment the bear left on this post. I did cry. Ididn't have any tissues so my make-up was ruined, but I could care less, because I have the best husband in the world.


Ok, enough bragging.

something freaky

I NEVER click on pop-ups or advertisements on the side bar, but the other day I found one I couldn’t refuse. Now, I can say no to almost anything. I mean that seriously, years of being pushed over by friends and family as a child made me a strong adult with an uncanny ability to speak my mind. (But that’s another post entirely) ‘No’ comes much easier now, I am proud to say. But I had a relapse recently…

In very large and very bright flashing letters the ad asked, “Want to see something freaky?”

Well, honestly, what’s a girl to do? I don’t know about you people, but for me the answer to that question will always, without a doubt be…oh fuck yeah! I believe seeing a freaky thing every now and then is good for the soul; it makes you feel better about yourself. You understand, with that attitude it was my obligation to click on the ad. You get me, right?

Anyway, the ‘something freaky’ turned out to be a big letdown. Did you know you could get your horoscope sent to your cell phone every day for 50 cents? That’s not freaky; it’s a scam. I can buy my local newspaper for $0.50 to get my horoscope and they also throw in the news, the comics page and a goddamn crossword. How’s that for freaky, bitches? Shit, they could have at least had a picture of a woman fucking a horse. Needless to say, I have learned my lesson. No more clicking on pop-ups for me, thank you very much.


Note-if you haven’t seen ‘40 year old virgin’, please ignore the woman-fucking-horse comment. :P