Awkward Conversations II

I have a story to tell. But first I have a confession to make.

Confession: I regularly talk on the phone while taking a bath. Like, all the time. So much so that my family is very used to this. Now, on with the story…

Last night while I was taking a bath I realized that I hadn’t talked with Billabong in like three days. That is an abnormally long time for us to go without talking, so I grabbed my cell phone and called him to see what was up.

~Ring~ Ring~

Billabong: (answering) “Hey, were have you been? I’ve been trying to call you for like two days.”

Jiffinner: “I know, sorry. I somehow keep missing all your calls.”

Billabong: “No big. So what are you doing?”

Jiffinner: “Taking a bath. You?”

Billabong: “I’m on my way home, we had UIL Poetry at (another school) today. And I’m upset with Mrs.R.”

(side note: Mrs. R is his One Act teacher and one of his favorite’s.)

Jiffinner: “Why?”

Billabong: “Well, she’s been saying things to me that she shouldn’t be saying. Like she has serious feelings for me and things like that.”

Jiffinner: “What!?!”

At this point I hear background laughter and realize that Mrs. R is with him and he is joking around.

Jiffinner: “So you’re driving home with Mrs. R?”

Billabong: “Yeah, and a couple of other people who were in UIL Poetry. Want to talk to her? Here.”

Before I can say no, Billabong hands the phone to his teacher whom I have never met.

Mrs. R: “Hello, Billabong’s Sister.”

Jiffinner: “Hello, how are you?”

Mrs. R: “Great, how are you?”

Jiffinner: Looking down at my bath water “Great.”

Mrs. R: “So, Billabong told me you watched Brokeback Mountain. Was it good?”

Jiffinner: “I thought so, yes.”

Mrs. R: “Good, because I want to see it but none of the teachers I work with will go with me to see it so I’m thinking about dragging your brother along to see it with me. But I’m sure that will get the rumor mill started.”

Jiffinner: laughing “Well, it was a good movie, worth the rumors I think.”

Mrs. R: “Good, thanks. Well, I’m going to hand the phone back to Billabong now. Nice to talk to you.”

Jiffinner: “Thanks, nice talking to you also.”

Billabong: “Hey, I’m back.”

Jiffinner: “Dude, I just had a conversation with your teacher while sitting in the bathtub. About Brokeback Mountain of all things.”

My brother in true Billabong fashion, laughs and tells his teacher that I am taking a bath and relays what I had just said.

Jiffinner: “I am thoroughly freaked out now, I have to let you go.”

Billabong: Still laughing, “Ok, I love you and I’ll call you later.”


Yeah, bye…fucker.